Wheels of Fortune

Wheels of Fortune  –  A R Munday -aidd-  10,700 words

Chapter One  –

He was a reliable lad, everyone said so. Self confident and as happy on his own as he was with the lads. “A bit lippy,” was a neighbours description. He had worked for the town chemist for almost a year since leaving school. His un-thought-out plan was to go down the mines with his mates but his granddad was the pit gate man and he stopped him in his tracks and told him in no uncertain terms to clear off and find a different job. He wasn’t going down the mine.
He got employment working for the town chemist but the pay was poor and the prospects nil. If it wasn’t for the tips from the delivery of medicines to old ladies the job wouldn’t be worth doing. The tips made almost half his wages.
The sun was shining today heralding the summer to come as Freddy pedalled slowly along looking for where the sheep were being rounded up. When he saw that he knew he would probably locate the missing sheep-dip bath. The bath was hired out along with the chemicals but the farmer would pass it on instead of returning it.
Freddy stopped his pedalling at a farm gate and took a break to re-read the letter.
After reading it again he folded it up and returning it to the envelope, put it back his inside pocket. He then climbed onto the stone gate pillar and looked about the valley in front of him. To his left he could see sheep coming off the mountain and wondered if they were unknowingly being taken to the sheep dip. It was worth a punt so he set off once again to pedal the mile or two to the farmhouse. His pride lifted as he got near and saw that yes indeed, two men and a woman were pushing sheep up the ramp and into the bath. The men were herding and dragging the animals through while the woman; presumably the farmer’s wife, was ducking each sheep’s head under the water with a sweeping brush. Once, twice, before pulling the wooden bar out to let the animal out of the dip then replacing it again to trap the next animal. The sheep didn’t like it but it was far better than having tick worms munch their way through the skin and fester inside them.
Freddy left his bike at the farm gate and strode purposefully up to the little group.

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Woodlathe

I at last found time to have another go on the wood turning lathe I bought. It’s good fun but it makes a mess and I was an inch deep in wood shavings when I packed up. I brushed it away to take this photo. Continue reading

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London Weekend

Dec 2014

We’ve returned from a great weekend in London. A show, shopping and sightseeing.

The show was “The Jersey Boys” at the Piccadilly Theatre that tells the life of Frankie Valli with great rock n roll music from start to finish and wonderful performances from the cast.

The next day we were dropped off in Park Lane for the day and wandered on a sightseeing tour; first through Green Park to Buckingham Palace.

They're changing guard at Buckingham Palace

They’re changing guard at Buckingham Palace

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Clive’s Thunderbolt

The finished Castle for the school project.

The Finished Catle

The Finished Castle


(Sorry the photo is blurred. it’s been handed in now so we can’t re-do it)

ooooooooooooooooooo

Story – Cive’s Thunderbolt
20141212 – armund.org

Clive went to the lavatories for a pee. While standing there he read the toilet humour on the wall:
“You don’t come here to piss about, just have a piss and piss off out.”
It was in purple so he surmised it was written with a copying pencil by some clerk or tradesman.

He smiled to himself as he recalled his mother’s favoured reply to rudeness.
“Charmed I’m sure.” said with a menacing irony and an unblinking stare.
The smile melted away as he pondered what he was doing by admiring the girl so much. He knew he was smitten, she wasn’t simply attractive, she seemed to be someone special who he would love to be with not just love to be in bed with.
“Still no harm done,” he half spoke aloud. Apart from a few complimentary glances at her all of the rest was safely in his head and he hadn’t made any comments to Ethan. Apart from ordering drinks he hadn’t spoken to her either. No asides, no compliments, no flirtatious comments. All that had happened was that he looked at her face and felt a deep deep longing that came from nowhere and hit him like a thunderbolt. As he buttoned his flies he resolved to spike the heavenly pleasures looking at her gave him.

Sat now at his table with Ethan and a recharged glass he was aware of her moving between the tables clearing and chatting. He could not help himself, she was perfect. Slim and petite with wonderful posture. Her back as straight as a ballet dancer, her face aloft as though she was balancing books on her head. She possessed a bust neither large nor small but it was emphasized by her tiny waist around which a broad hem held her long slim black skirt. Her hair was deep brown and shining and rolled up into a bob on top. As she meandered through the tables she came very close to him but did not look his way. Instead she leaned over the adjacent table and stretching forward wiped up a small spill in front of a motherly woman and her husband.

“Are you enjoying a rest ma’am?” she asked, “did you come far today?”
“From London dear”, the woman replied, “It took six hours, the train stopped all the time, very trying it is too. Still, it would take nearer six days in a coach in my grandmother’s time.”
The girl smiled then standing erect she raised her hands to fiddle with an unseen stray lock on her neck thus silhouetting her perfect profile.

The beer flowed in the George Hotel and the girl looked more attractive than before. Ethan had joined in a game of dice and was enjoying himself. Clive was at his shoulder jollying him on but could not resist glancing at the girl. She seemed to have a look of dissatisfaction though it disappeared when she spoke and she almost seemed to smile when she took payments. He was a little beguiled; Marianne was wonderful, always cheerful and optimistic and a delight to be with: so; he wondered, what was it about this girl that so invaded his consciousness. The possibility that it may be a mix of business success and alcohol creating exuberance did occur to him, but he dismissed it, the feeling and longing was overwhelming. The quarters of the clock passed without observance and afternoon melted into early evening until at half past six o’clock Ethan bid his unexpected departure to Clive, chatted for a few more minutes and went off to catch the 7:03 train for Leeds and home.

Clive was now alone amongst strangers. His glass was full and the diners, drinkers and toss-pots who had shared his afternoon were, all but him; departed. The few people in the room were newly arrived and still sober and upstanding. He moved to sit at a corner table and wondered what he should do. He had lost track of time but did not want the day over yet. Sense returned when he asked a gentleman at the next table the time as he seemed to possess a pocket watch and was told it was 6:55pm. Clive looked at the girl once again and noted that she seemed to sense that he was looking at her and she looked up at him while tapping another glass of beer then, looking him squarely in the eyes, smiled for a second before slowly returned her gaze to the glass. Clive did not know how to take it; was she being coquettish or was she simply thinking he had spent well and would return another day with the help of a little pleasantry. She was walking away from him now with her back to him and over her shoulder he became aware of the landlord, Archie (Grumpy) Gains staring with a serious look straight at him. He cursed himself for being stupid and walked out into the cool early evening leaving the last of his beer in the tankard. The fresh air hit him almost straight away and he had to take support from one of the six white Tuscan-Doric pillars embellishing the front of the George Hotel. After moving along Coney Street a pillar at a time he decided to rest in the shadows hoping to acclimatise so set himself down on a small high sill reminiscent of the old misericords from his choir days at church. He leaned silently in the shadows hoping to be absorbed into the blackness.

He first heard someone then saw the girl again walking past across the street from his hidden lair. As she passed on her way he shuffled forward to watch her departure but was surprised when she instead stopped at the door of the photographers shop, knocked and waited at the door to be let in. Looking up at the sign he saw that the photographers name was Gains. Realisation washed over him, she wasn’t simply a barmaid, she was a relative helping out her family and Grumpy was probably her uncle.

Feeling much improved in demeanour he set off for the tram stop and home but not before deciding that next week he would frequent The George Hotel more often and he would be making an appointment to have is picture taken.

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Joey’s Thunderbolt

10 Dec 2014

“You missed the distraction Joey. The pointal passed you on the port. Then praps star bored fits better. Let go, let it slip and melt.”

“Quint Guy, the best quint ever. I’ll never find another like her. What’s my move, my shimmy?”

“I knew a cheerful soldier boy who grinned at life with empty joy,
slept soundly through the lonesome dark
and whistled early with the Lark.

In winter trenches cold and glum
with cramps and lice and lack of rum,
he put a bullet through his brain,
we never spoke of him again.”

“What you saying Guy. What’s the message?”

“Nothing’s for eternity Joey, unless you slip over the edge. ‘Fact most stuff of the heart is only months in melting, not years. Well, not unless you’re Miss Havisham.”

“Was she your teacher or summat?”

“No Joey, a literary character.”

“Was she the soldier boys sister then?”

“Er, how’s that dog you got Joey?”

“Gone, gone to the big country. He became a sheep dog.”

“Did he?”

“Yep, sort of, savaged three sheep and was shot by farmer Palmer.”

“What d’you do?”

“Nigel was caught dead to rights and then dead to the world. I was a field away so just walked away. Who wants a dead dog?”

“Bloody hell, you must have been a bit hurt?”

“Not as hurt as the sheep or the farmer, worth a lot of money. I sneaked off and said nowt, his collar didn’t have an address on it.”

“What about Nuria Guy, how do I get her to spin on me again?”

“You don’t Joey, enjoy the memory and move slowly away. She left you. It’s up to her to give you a signal, an encouragement. Without that it’s over, let it go.”

“What sort of signal?”

“I don’t know, like she will message you asking for you to return something you have of hers. A CD or a magazine or whatever.”

“I don’t have anything of hers that I know of.”

“There doesn’t have to be anything, it’s better that way. You can’t say yes or no. You have to talk, to discuss said items disappearance, like Schrodinger’s cat.”

“Oh that, yep, Is it dead, Is it alive, is it even in the bloody box.”

“Exactly.”

“But it’s been over two days and she hasn’t been in contact.”

“Yeah, not exactly pining is she. I think it’s over Joey. Start decontaminating man, wash her out.”

“How do you know when you’re in love?

“I couldn’t really say Joey, I’ve only ever been in lust. I’ve heard that if you need to ask then you aren’t. Then again I was infatuated with the geography teacher when I was fifteen. I would have done anything for her.”

“What happened then Guy?”

“After the two week Easter break it had gone, vanished. She was simply another good looking woman again. Good job I didn’t propose mate.”

Both men laughed long and loud.

“Do yer wanna fag Guy?”

“Yer got some?”

“Yup, course, here you go. I know, supposed to give them up cause of my asthma but got offered some duty frees cheap; well you can’t turn those down can you. Pound a pack if you want some.”

Pwor, shame to say no at that price. I’ll have two packs if you’ve got em.”

Joey’s phone rings.

“Hello hello, message from Nuria Guy. You were right”

“That’s good Joey, What’s she say?”

“Not too sure, Not asking for anything back, a bit garbled, she’s written that last night was the best and she can’t wait to see me again.”

“Really, thought you hadn’t seen her for days?”

“I haven’t, it must be a typo or predictive text buggering it all up again.”

“Let me have a read. bloody hell! You’re Joey not John, it Looks to me like she selected the wrong recipient from her contact list, and all those kisses, and no mention of the split, It’s over Joey, she’s moved on.”

“Whoa, don’t cry mate, don’t do that.”

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A Good turn with a Castle

A little bit of magic came my way again yesterday.

I was visiting dad’s grave in the local cemetery and saw that the arboriculturists were in cutting back the tree line to the south. Most of the branches were being noisily fed into the chipping machine but the larger ones, those over 3 inches/75mm diameter were too big for the machine and instead were cut into short lengths and stacked along the hedge bank. I strolled over to one of the guys and asked what they were planning to do with the logs. ‘Nothing’, was the response, they stayed and it seems were slowly taken away for burning by various people.

I of course asked if I could have 1 or 2 of them because I have bought a wood lathe and needed large lumps of wood to turn things out of.
“Yes,” said the foreman, “come tomorrow morning with your car boot empty and we will sort you out.”

It seems my dear dad is still doing me favours by guiding good fortune my way.

Today I went along to see the guy again and good to his word he let me have a boot full. I have promised to turn him some thing out of one, probably a giant chess piece like the king.

A boot full of billets

A boot full of billets

oooooooooooooooo

Also yesterday my second-to-come along granddaughter, Lauren, informs us that she has to make a castle for geography homework and it has to be in in a week. It then trickled out that half of her friends are well into theirs or even finished. Seemingly it was given out as a project three weeks ago.
She is becoming very sporty is Lauren. She plays for the football team, netball team, and hockey team and it does seem that it has taken over most of her spare time.

After a bit of harsh talk from her dad and us as to why she has left it this long to do anything and tell us, she engaged in the classic,
“No one would help me and I don’t know where to start. She (the teacher) said we could bake a castle cake or make a cardboard or wooden model or whatever form we chose. My friends have worked with their dads/mums/siblings etc.”
It’s a non-sequiter of course; an excuse to shift the blame for forgetting about it onto some one else.

I am now in full castle building mode while Lauren stands about waiting to be told what to cut or hold or glue or mostly,
“What do you think, it’s your project?”

The answer is “Dunno really, what you said.” and then, “my hockey stick is too short, teacher says it should reach my hip and all of the school ones are too little for me. There’s a sale on at Sports Direct granddad.”

“Groan”

Moat and castle foundations dug

Moat and castle foundations dug

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Codes and Mr Turner

20141202

The Simon Singh book, “The Code Book”, has arrived. After a long perusal flicking forward and back again through many pages I can’t find anything about adding 1 or subtracting 1. I did however find a chart that helps code and decode the OTP lists. Oh, I got that wrong too. They aren’t called One Off Pads; they are called One Time Pads, OTPs. The coding list/chart is called a Vigenere Square after the cryptologist Blaise de Vigenere. In the square the letters have B as 1, C as 2 etc. and Z is 25, then A is 26. This must have been the source of my plus 1 subtract 1 confusion. So all seems correct as I published previously.

The code breaker breaks down in tears

The code breaker breaks down in tears

…………..

We went to the cinema today to see Mr Turner. It was about the life of JMW Turner the painter. It seemed to start halfway through his life then onward. He led a mixed up home life and a lot wasn’t stated. He and his father’s housekeeper grew old with him but her true relationship was not explained. She may have been his lover at some point but maybe just the one shag. There wasn’t a story as such but the scenes were beautiful a lot of the time, very visually attractive. Later in life he lives with a widow in Margate but it isn’t stated if they married or not. He treat his real wife and children as though they didn’t exist. Timothy Spall as Turner was masterful and we both enjoyed it but there wasn’t, as I wrote above, a story to relate.

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Plumbing and quiz solution

All of a sudden Britain has taken another American cultural icon, ‘Black Friday’.
I and most people I know don’t know what that is nor what it means. Well we do now. It’s a sales promotion based on the Friday following something called ‘Thanksgiving’. I have no idea what thanksgiving is other than it must be a religious feast. There is no comparable celebration in Britain or Europe for that matter. More arcane therefore is the strange name Black Friday, not a good name, and where did it came from?

Anyway, it all went wrong in that people were acting like it was the last turkey in the shop and pushing, shoving and even flooring others or being floored. Not a pretty site and for what? To save 20 pounds on a product that wasn’t your first choice anyway. One major company only had the 20 percent discount for the 10 minutes from midnight. After that it was normal prices. Crazy crackers.

The whole of the Western world runs on consumerism so I shouldn’t really complain. What would we do without it? Work two days a week and be almost as well off?

………….

I have been busy this week replacing radiator valves. Most of them weep from the wheel flange but there is no way to re-pack the gland. They are not made to repair, they are made to fail and be bought again and replaced. Consumerism?
It should of course have created a days work for a plumber but I was let down by two of them so decided to do it myself. It wasn’t an easy decision as I don’t like plumbing; correction, I hate plumbing. In the past I have found that whatever part I repair or renew an associated part will break and need working on too.
Anyway, a couple of days ago I set to having purchased the valves and checked that the olive ring nuts were the same thread as my existing ones so It would be a simple exchange of valves and not a cut-the-olive-off job. It’s plastic pipe and removing crushed olive rings is a nightmare. The olive would have to be removed to change the nut if it wasn’t the same thread you understand.

After turning the boiler off and draining down I replaced 10 valves but then found that although they all looked the same two of them were a larger diameter thread, Sugar. I had to take them back to the store and rummage through their stock to find two correct ones. An hour out of a busy day. As I said, something always goes wrong. I turned the water back on at 17:10 and found two small leaks. For once the magic dust settled on me and so with a little brutal torque with the spanner both leaks stopped. The heating was back on by 18:30. The radiators all get hot but only eventually so it seems I need to throttle back the valves on the first to warm up to balance the system but that can be done over the next few days can it not.

A day of my life in that tray

A day of my life in that tray

…………….

Here is the solution to the quiz if you haven’t already de-coded it yourselves.
I can’t type it out so have written it out and photographed it instead.

One-Off-Pad solution

One-Off-Pad solution

Without the OOP list that is only used once it is impossible to decode the message. It can’t be broken.
What we can do strangely is back engineer it and get it to decode into any message that we like. In some countries It may even fool a judge into believing that was the message you sent. I will have a think about that one 🙂

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Cyphers are popular

From the response it seems that codes and cyphers are a popular subject. It’s late in my day to post now but I will tomorrow (today actually). I have just this/last evening sent for another copy of Mr Singh’s book of secrets but as of now I still haven’t got it so I still don’t know about the plus 1 and minus 1 system of One Off Pad coding. Today I have been busy with plumbing but I will reveal all in my next post.

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FURY the film plus a dog

I did an hours exercise today but I found it hard to do. It’s been almost two weeks since I last did any and it showed. After lunch we decided to go and see a film so went to see ‘FURY’ with Brad Pitt in the lead. It was WW2 setting and late in the day as the year was 1945. Brad is a tank commander who, owing to deaths becomes the commander of the remaining tanks and has adventures as they move on into Germany fighting all the way. I won’t give the story plots away but will say that I was entertained all the way through and would recommend seeing it. That is unless you are a bit squeamish or hate war in all its brutish meanderings.

On a lighter note I saw this in York last week and found it amusing.

Taking topiary to its limits

Taking topiary to its limits

I don’t know if I need to reveal the answer to the cypher quiz but I won’t today; maybe later.

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